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A blog, featuring the random thoughts and rants of a twentysomething.

23. Grrl. Undergrad. Wichita, Kansas. Slacker. Music Junkie. Oxymoron. Nerd. Sarcastic. Neurotic. Bored. Artistic. Apathetic.

Adamo
Shoot me now.
Nigga, please.
College is sweet.
Return of the Brown Eye

Dearest
Famfamfam
Vbrush

Break Away
Flutter Pages
Glitter

Well, it's been a weird couple of months. In that time, I have found new ways to fail at college and life. As I try my best to pick up the pieces, maybe I'll fix up this place. There have been some plans to absolve the personal site and replace it with a "group" effort. Since I'll have some time in the next couple of weeks, we'll see if I can make it happen.


I noticed that my blog still seems to be the target of someone's failed joke. Seriously guys, wtf?! I see you noticed my last post and decided to take my advice. I really appreciated (and lawl'd at) the added bonus of rape and Michael Jackson themed links. I also commend you for attempting to kill my comment system with that line of code, but it's really a waste. I guess I should also thank you, because without your annoyance I would forget this blog even existed.



SPAM is fun and tasty. Unless, of course, it comes in the form of 300+ comments about an online casino! You could at least entertain me with a change in topic. Options to consider: Penis enlargement, Viagra, Drug Discounts in Mexico/Canada, Discounts on Viagra in Mexico/Canada, buttsecks, fapping, your mother, and CP.




I just got an email from Dell about their new "luxury" laptop, Adamo. Seriously, what the fuck? I'm assuming it's supposed to be Dell's answer to the Macbook Air, but with an extreme douse of ugly. Is this really necessary? I mean, it has always been Apple's and Sony's job to satisfy the trendy bastards. This thing is looking less like a PC and more like a Prada bag. Hell, just look at the page. I'm confused.


I've spent a lot of my life locked in a fantasy world, but living on my own has forced me to touch the ground. Still, I have yet to perfect the emotional walk on pins and needles reality has shown itself to be. I have not found the balance or state of mind to withstand the pain, and,instead of truly living, I continue to spend a lot of time lying to myself. Reality is far too bright, and there are times when neither my retinas nor my heart can withstand it. Today is one of those days, and even I can't understand the point of it all. However, here I lay. A messy pile of emo filth. My stomach tied in knots. And while I know of no reason for sadness, I have the strong urge to cry. Or maybe I know full well of my reason, and I'm just beginning the cycle all over again.


I got a rude awakening this morning from GE Money Bank because of my Paypal Credit Card. That I must say, was the most hilariously entertaining chat I've had with a bill collector. A middle-aged woman telling me that I was a worthless, lazy, idiot, and that I needed to be taught a lesson in responsibility. She proceeded to tell me that my college career was a waste because I couldn't use proper English (as if anyone can when they've just woken up, are terribly sick, and don't have much of a voice left to begin with), and that I was no better than a shoplifter.

I couldn't help but laugh at her long-winded speech on responsibility...which I told her reminded me of a talk my mother would have given me. She didn't take kindly to it, and treated me as a hostile customer even though I never used profanity, or raised my voice (not like I could anyway). I could hear all her representatives that listened in giggling in the background. I hope it brightened their days as well. I really don't care how stupid I sounded.

Honestly, I don't think anyone, whether they owe money or not, should be subject to that kind of harassment. I'd rather be served a court date, or put in prison (at least their verbal abuse would be half-way justifiable, and in-person). Out of all the cards and bills I've been struggling to pay, GE Money has been the only company to harass me. Hell, they'll call 12-18 times a day for being a couple days late. The most extremely funny part in the matter is that I'm not currently behind in payments. I caught up last week, and I have a payment due on February 6 that I am more than willing to pay...ON THAT DATE!

Credit cards are a mistake that most college students get brainwashed with...and I'm no different. Last summer, I realized that working was the main reason I was failing and got 2 years behind in my degree. I had to quit. I'm trying to take a heavier load of classwork and finish up. I sold my car to try and play off my debt, but of course it wasn't enough. Now I have to try my best to pay bills with left over financial aid, and get a job on campus. Neither of which has been working out too well.

I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me. I got myself into this mess, and I'm not trying to avoid it. Just knowing I have bills that I can't pay (even if I don't see the statements or listen to the calls) weighs heavily on my conscience. But at the same time, I DON'T SHIT GOLD BRICKS!

Oh yea, to all my friend's who have been bugging me about it. Today is the day that this oreo had a nigga moment. You missed out.


I've actually been getting out of my room for the last couple of days, because almost everyone is back at the dorms. I've been wasting my nights at the local hookah bar, my mornings playing Rock Band, and my afternoons stoned and/or passed out. Life is awesome.

Well, until class starts...


I just finished watching Zack and Miri Make a Porno, and I don't know what to think of it. A View Askew film that doesn't feature Jay and Silent Bob always ends up being an awkward love story. What's with that?

Kevin Smith is usually a god when it comes to witty, tasteless humor, and he didn't let me down there. I don't know how stuff this bad can be so damn funny, but wow. Then the movie just seemed like it tripped and tumbled down a hill half way through. I think it happened right around the time Deacon got 'frosted'. Then somehow this movie about losers and sex was wrapped in a (saturday-morning-special-esque) moral of true love and lifetime friendship. Gag me! I really, really hated the scene when Delaney invites Zack over to take a second look at the tapes. It was just painful.

Though I complain, it was still fun to watch and I'll probably watch it again. Cause let's face it, I'm a sucker for anything with Kevin Smith's name on it.

On a final note, another painful thing to look at: Jason Mewes' penis. XD XD I did not see that coming, and I really never wanted to...


If you can see this it means my server transfer was successful. I've actually had to move twice in the last 24 hours. Why are there so many gawd-awful hosting companies on the web?

Right now I'm on http://freehostia.com. So, my links could possibly be alternating between jasbra23.freehostia.com and fluorescent-skies.org. That is probably just an error being caused by installing my blog software before DNS was updated. It's not a forward, I swear. Once I sort that out I'll fully remove that subdomain from my account.


I'm having some problems with my current host. Apparently, they don't disperse their free customers evenly between the servers. Most of us are on Server 21 and it is either starting to fail from too much demand or is simply being attacked. Since it's free, the admins aren't all that determined to fix it. For a while, the MySQL database for my blog couldn't be accessed and now everything is just generally laggy and annoying. I'm gonna look around for something better and probably make a move in the next couple of days.